Guys, interchange might not be the right word for what I’m talking about. You know the big, curvy thing you drive on to transfer from one freeway to another? Yeah, that. Specifically the one transferring cranky Angelenos from the 10 East to the 405 North.
I pass over this curvy thing pretty much every day as part of the commission of my cookie-delivery duties. Last Thursday, I noticed something on the side of the road. A fullish bottle of orange Gatorade. Hilariously, it did occur to me to open my door, grab the Gatorade, which might well have been sealed, and drink it. I was pretty thirsty; I generally don’t drink enough fluids. I restrained this impulse, largely because I didn’t want to open my door on a freeway interchange.
Friday I passed by it again. This time, thirst did not enter my mind. In fact, in the following entry, let it be known that while I am usually thirsty, thirst plays no role. Instead, I noted the Gatorade bottle as a curiosity.
Then I had two days off. I did some comedy, played some video games, and ignored the Oscars.
Monday, the Gatorade bottle was still present, right where I had left it.
Tuesday, the same.
Wednesday, I drove by that spot, and saw no Gatorade bottle. There you go, I thought. Either somebody decided to snag it, or they clean the interchange on Wednesday mornings. Then I continued driving, and saw that somehow the Gatorade bottle had rolled a good ways further along the curve. Pretty sneaky, Gatorade bottle!
Today, it was still there, in its new location. I tried to snap a photo, but was forced by the honking of probably everyone in Santa Monica trying to escape to continue driving before I could line up the shot. The resulting picture was a blurry mess of mostly my dashboard.
Guys, does this Gatorade bottle have its own Facebook page yet? It’s hung around for at least a week, which is longer than the Harlem Shake(source needed). Also, it turns out that freeway maintenance does not include a weekly cleaning. That’s what I learned today. Check back next Thursday, when we learn whether it includes a biweekly cleaning.